3:22 am - Fri, Mar 23, 2012

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Plugged In

I know most of you did not know that I got saved through television. Yes, TV. It all happened one late night in October 2004, as I was watching CBN Asia. Then host, Coney Reyes, prayed and prophesied about a young boy who is praying for the reconciliation of his parents. It was all very surreal but I know God was talking to me. I knelt before God in awe of His greatness and power. I accepted Him as my Lord and Savior and I claimed of HIS promise.  It was the very first time I encountered God. That huge step of faith started it all and it went well for me – but not for long.

I moved to Davao to study Industrial Engineering but I learned a lot more than that. I was 16 and for the first time in my life, I am free to do whatever I like. No nagging mom that says do this and that. No siblings to take care of and most especially no responsibilities to handle but myself. But sadly, that lack of guidance and too much freedom led me to both legalism and sin. However, because I felt happier with my life there compared to the one I left in Gensan and that promise I claimed did not happen yet, I clung to whatever made me happy, even if I know I have sinned. In other words, I failed God.

After 5 years in college, I graduated with a diploma on my right hand and a bunch of learning experiences on my left. And that was my confirmation that I survived all the circumstances that came my way. But did I? I’m afraid not. How can I say I won if all these time, I put God at the backseat of my life? Deep down, I know I was never truly happy.

I went on with my life after college with no definite direction, I was moving with the flow as I searched for happiness and meaning. But one night in August 2011, I came to God in desperation. The family is facing a great crisis, everything seems to be out of hand and I have no one to turn to. And so I confronted God. But instead of being resentful, there was this loud voice inside my heart that says “continue to trust in Him”. Then I remembered his words in Psalms 23:

 The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.  You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

Instead of going down to that old road of sin, I returned to the familiar God whom I shelved all these years. I stepped up in faith and trusted God even more. He intruded in my life and since that night, a lot of spiritual breakthroughs came and it has never been the same.

When I accepted God and take hold of his promise 8 years ago, I expected my life to be perfect. I expected my parents to be back on each other arms and for us to live happily ever after again. I expected God to snap his fingers and magic my life it the way I expected it to be. But it did not happen. But consequently or not, I went through all those bumps for me to be here typing down my testimony. Indeed, God has his own mysterious and unexpected ways of revealing himself to us. And his timing is never too early or too late. His timing is just perfect.

Looking back, I believe God had allowed a lot of things in my past for me to realize what is truly essential - Him. And yes, I am still not perfect and although my parents already had their big talk last year, they are not still 100% ok but I will continue to honor God and praise Him because now I realized that it has never been about me but it has always been about GOD.

Ultimately, what fuels me now is God Himself. His word, his love and the peace that he brought in my life are more than enough to say that I am greatly favored. Although at times, I am discouraged by the big problems that come my way, I take comfort in the fact that I have a bigger God to take care of those. Indeed, he is not concerned of our circumstances but of changing our hearts and strengthening us - for our future. 

2:56 am

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CHRISTIAN WAYS TO REDUCE STRESS

 “Never borrow from the future. If you worry about what may happen tomorrow and it doesn’t happen, you have worried in vain. Even if it does happen, you have to worry twice.”

1. Pray
2. Go to bed on time.
3. Get up on time so you can start your day unrushed.
4. Say NO to projects that won’t fit into your time schedule, or that will compromise your mental health.
5. Delegate tasks to capable others.
6. Simplify and unclutter your life.
7. Less is more… (Although one is often not enough, two are often too many.)
8. Allow extra time to do things and to get to places.
9. Pace yourself. Spread out big changes and difficult projects over time; don’t lump the hard things all together.
10. Take one day at a time.
11. Separate worries from concerns. If a situation is concern, find out what God would have you do and let go of the anxiety. If you can’t do anything about a situation, forget it.
12. Live within your budget; don’t use credit cards for ordinary purposes.
13. Have backups; an extra car key in your wallet, an extra house key buried in the garden, extra stamps, etc.
14. Do something for the KID in you everyday
15. Carry a bible with you to read while waiting in line.
16. Get enough rest.
17. Eat right.
18. Get organized so everything has its place.
19. Listen to a tape while driving that can help improve your quality of life.
20. Write down thoughts and inspirations.
21. Everyday, find time to be alone.
22. Having problems? Talk to God on the spot. Try to nip small problems in the bud. Don’t wait until it’s time to go to bed to try and pray.
23. Make friends with Godly people.
24. Keep a folder of favorite scriptures on hand.
25. Remember that the shortest bridge between despair and hope is often a good “Thank You Jesus.”
26. Laugh
27. Laugh some more!
28. Take your work seriously, but not yourself at all.
29. Develop a forgiving attitude (most people are doing the best they can)
30. Be kind to unkind people (they probably need it the most)
31. Sit on your ego.
32. Talk less; listen more.
33. Slow down.
34. Remind yourself that you are not the general manager of the universe.
35. Every night before bed, think of one thing you’re grateful for that you’ve never been  grateful for before.

GOD HAS A WAY OF TURNING THINGS AROUND YOU.

“If God is for us, who can be against us?” (Romans 8:31)

I believe that all of us are stressed out to a certain extent. However, God did not design us to worry but to SHINE for HIM. Let’s continue HONORING GOD and MAKING DISCIPLES. 

12:53 pm - Fri, Mar 16, 2012

Revival

Lord, thank you for being with me in my journey.

November 16, 2008

It’s been a while since I last wrote in paper. For the past year, I developed this laziness to write so I use the technology and just type my thoughts down. My laptop is useless at the moment leaving me no choice but to write. But it’s ok, I missed this also so I don’t mind.

Basically, I wrote because there is something going inside of me. There’s this person who want to break free. There’s a burst of emotions and thoughts are fast racing in my brain. For some reason, I know what it is. This is hope. The last few days were horrible. I was so depressed and sad. Kinda emotional. A bit hopeless. Vulnerable. Those words were to describe my feelings. But after the service this morning, I woke up to a reality. Ptr. Peter Tan Chi delivered a powerful message about faith. I was struck with his words that go “There are lots of things you can’t learn about God unless you experience”. Then there was a flashback of past memories. What God has impressed in me was that you experienced all those things for a reason – and that is for you to learn about me. Then I laugh. All these years, I have been resentful at God for everything. I was blaming Him for what I have been, for messing my life. I know I have sinned but I told myself that it’s ok because I am able to justify the setbacks I am into. I know deep down that it’s not a proper thinking, but I was blinded by my pain, anger and depression. I laugh because God reminded me again that He is not God only for good things but for beneficial things. I had this misconception about Him that He did all these because He punishes me. In a way, maybe it was right. But I forgot to realize that He punishes me because He loves me. He wants to bless me and He wants me to grow some faith in Him. Sure thing, I spent my mornings reading the Bible, getting to know God, but it was just on the head level. It didn’t pass through my heart. Ptr. Peter put it all in one word – Legalism. I am in denial but true, I am suffering from legalism. I have always been afraid and guilty of doing mistakes because of its consequences and punishments in the same way that I wanted to do good for its rewards. I read the bible because not reading means setbacks. I am afraid of God not because I love Him but because I know He can destroy me and everything I have in an instant. For years, I didn’t realize that I have been failing because of my weak foundation. Now it makes sense because I grew up not praying during meal times, going to church but to play because we are always late, didn’t have to pray because I got what I want as a child. I was living a life of a prince, then my family fell apart and crisis arose. After those, I began to lose hope. In 2004, I met God. I thought then that my old life will come back again. But I was wrong. Neither did I know that worse things will happen. This time, I chose to sin to justify everything. Instead of putting my faith to God, I sin to understand the pain I’m having. I was being masochistic. A few times, I tried to go back to God but I am always blinded and it became difficult. I have been too far from God. Things became difficult to fix. There’s no way out. The easiest way to escape is to forget about everything. I tried to backslide, but God didn’t let go of me. For some reason, He always pulls me back even if I sinned a lot. It has been my struggle for 10 years and I have been running in circles.

I have plans of organizing my life, of pointing it to the right direction, of managing it to succeed. All I wanted is to fix my life. But anytime I attempted to, I can’t arrive at something. Maybe it’s because God has a better way. Sometimes, I tend to forget that life is not about me, but He who made me. That I am just a transient in this world and sooner or later, I’ll die. I want position, power, possession because I was obsessed with myself. Lots of things happened in my 19 years of living. I had a good life and lost it. I had much then I had less. I experienced happiness and grief. But maybe it all happened for me to be whole. I could say, for my age I had much, but contrary to my feelings, I didn’t give up. Maybe because deep inside me, I know there is hope.

Now I want to make this simple. Be with God, know Him, trust Him and seek His kingdom and all shall be added unto me (Roman 8:23). He will make a way because He is the only way.

2:02 pm - Sun, Feb 26, 2012

The Parable of the Teacup

There was a couple who took a trip to England to shop in a beautiful antique store to celebrate their 25th wedding anniversary. They both liked antiques and pottery, and especially teacups. Spotting an exceptional cup, they asked “May we see that? We’ve never seen a cup quite so beautiful.” As the lady handed it to them, suddenly the teacup spoke, “You don’t understand. I have not always been a teacup. There was a time when I was just a lump of red clay.

My master took me and rolled me pounded and patted me over and over and I yelled out, “Don’t do that.” “I don’t like it!” “Let me alone,” but he only smiled, and gently said; “Not yet!”

Then. WHAM! I was placed on a spinning wheel and suddenly I was spun around and around and around. “Stop it I’m getting so dizzy I’m going to be sick!”, I screamed. But the master only nodded and said, quietly; ‘Not yet.’

He spun me and poked and prodded and bent me out of shape to suit himself and then… Then he put me in the oven. I never felt such heat. I yelled and knocked and pounded at the door.” Help! Get me out of here!” I could see him through the opening and I could read his lips as he shook his head from side to side, ‘Not yet’.

When I thought I couldn’t bear it another minute, the door opened. He carefully took me out and put me on he shelf, and I began to cool. Oh, that felt so good! “Ah, this is much better,” I thought. But, after I cooled he picked me up and he brushed and painted me all over. The fumes were horrible. I thought I would gag. ‘Oh, please; Stop it, Stop it!! I cried. He only shook his head and said. ‘Not yet!’.

Then suddenly he put me back in to the oven. Only it was not like the first one. This was twice as hot and I just knew I would suffocate. I begged. I pleaded. I screamed. I cried I was convinced I would never make it. I was ready to give up. Just then the door opened and he took me out and again placed me on the shelf, where I cooled and waited and waited, wondering “What’s he going to do to me next?” An hour later he handed me a mirror and said ‘Look at yourself.’ And I did. I said, ‘That’s not me; that couldn’t be me. It’s beautiful. I’m beautiful!”

Quietly he spoke: “I want you to remember, then, he said, ‘I know it hurt to be rolled and pounded and patted, but had I just left you alone, you’d have dried up. I know it made you dizzy to spin around on the wheel, but if I had stopped, you would have crumbled. I know it hurt and it was hot and disagreeable in the oven, but if I hadn’t put you there, you would have cracked. I know the fumes were bad when I brushed and painted you all over, but if I hadn’t done that, you never would have hardened. You would not have had any color in your life. If I hadn’t put you back in that second oven, you wouldn’t have survived for long because the hardness would not have held. Now you are a finished product. Now you are what I had in mind when I first began with you.”

http://www.millerwebs.com/teacup.html

11:25 pm - Thu, Feb 16, 2012

The World Who Would Remember Me

“When I die, how would the world remember me?”

This is the prevailing question in my mind that I know no one could answer except me. But I’ll assure you that right before I’ll die, i could answer this and made it to REALITY.

 A bigger part of me is afraid of death. It’s because all my life, whenever a death of love ones come, it affects me badly. Well, who’s not? Right? All of us have fears in losing someone we love or even losing our own lives thus leaving this world. Speaking of the word “LEAVING”, it’s a 7-letter word that entails entrusting things when you go away for some valid reasons. And as we all know, DEATH is also a reason for leaving things behind even we like it or not for it’s inevitable. But for most people, leaving things before we die serves as their assurance that when they leave, the world will remember them. Just like for example, the great Albert Einstein, who contributed the Theory of Relativity or E=mc2 that changed the world, or the late Jose Rizal for its famous works like Noli Me Tangere and El Filibusterismo that make us Filipinos proud, or even Sir Isaac Newton for his discovery, The Law of Motion and Gravitation… They’re just few of the world’s greatest men, but how about me? I know I’m not one of them… But deep inside me, I feel that even though I’m not as smart or excellent as them, I could somehow leave something memorable in this world that could let me say, “It’s worth living!”

 Hhmmm, let me see… I’m not that smart nor talented as some people may think but I think, all I can contribute is the entertainment by means of writing features and essays that people would love, cherish and relate with. Essays and features that they would treasure in their lives, forever. Essays and features that would let them realize how beautiful life is when you just try to look on good things. Essays and features that would make them forget their problems even just for a while and say, “I know I could get through this.” Essays and features that would let them realize that there is a God who is overwilling to help us on our sufferings and pains. And lastly, essays and features that would change their outlooks in all walks of life. I hope that I could fulfil this just before I leave so that I could say to myself that I didn’t squander my life, instead I used it as well as my God-given talents in making my life and other’s life worth living.

I know that these features and essays are not that important to other people, but I think it’s not useless as they think. Let’s just look at it in this manner, God gave his own life to save us from our sins and leave his WORD for us to remember Him. Some people may think it’s not important but almost all of us think it is. All it needs are people who would BELIEVE in YOU and in your CAPACITIES and most importantly, believe in YOURSELF.

I know deep in my heart that a lot of people wouldn’t remember me. But I’m not worried at them for I am much worried for the people who would remember me… Why? Because? I don’t know how they’ll say, “Ah, of course I remember Andrew, the writer!”

I was reading a few articles I wrote a few years back, and I was a bit nostalgic and surprised when I found this. I never thought that at that early on, I already had a sense of what I am doing. I love writing ever since but to actually pinpoint why I am doing this as captured in this very article, is a totally different thing. It reminded me of why I am here, sharing my views, my experience and my life – and that is to inspire, to communicate and to impact lives.

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Anyway, this was written back in 2004 in a writing seminar held in Gensan. Originally, it was an entry for the feature writing contest – English Category, and won as one of the top 10 entries.